There’s nothing on this earth quite like the feeling of getting new uniforms.
I remember in high school, as a junior first baseman on the Eisnehower Eagles baseball team, our coach decided that he wanted to imitate the Colorado Rockies’ combination of the black vest and the shirt with the primary color underneath. I, for one, was with it all the way. Of course, this was high school, and we didn’t have any money like that. So, if we wanted new uniforms, we’d have to do what every red-blooded American has had to do when they wanted something but they’re under the age of 18. We did a fundraiser, selling Airheads and Caramel Apple lollipops. I sold six boxes of those things and may or may not have made some extra change on the side. My new uniform was guaranteed. I was a happy man.
But then the unboxing happens. Coach brought out this huge box one day after a practice in 95-degree heat in southwest Oklahoma. I actually remember hoarding the water fountain in the dugout because THIRSTY. That’s when I heard Coach Cooksey bellow in the distance.
“MAISONET. #42. Come get your new duds!”
I’m pretty sure I peed on myself. Just a few drips, but still. Good God that thing was gorgeous. That black and baby blue trim. DAT 42. Jesus be a new uniform.
I say all of that to say this: The Charlotte Hornets are officially official, as Michael Jordan’s squad unveiled its new home, road and alternate uniforms this morning. The teal and purple are in full effect, and you can see Al Jefferson, Gerald Henderson and Kemba Walker all get their first glimpse of the uniforms here. There’s a lot going on in those links so take the time and check it out, but I have four questions first …
ONE: Where are the pinstripes?
I’m just baffled that they left off the stripes. These new Hornets uniforms are nice, but the pinstripes would’ve possibly taken them to elite status. Maybe it wasn’t possible with the new design they came up with, but dammit I wanted pinstripes. Muggsy Bogues would’ve approved.
TWO: Is it just me or do they sort of look like the Suns uniforms?
The NBA has a weird tendency where it unveils new uniforms and they all kinda look alike. I might be a harsh critic, but when I saw the purple alternate it definitely reminded me of the Suns.
THREE: What would Carmelo look like in a Hornets uniform?
Because I still think this is the sleeper choice for Melo to take his talents to this offseason. DO IT, MELO.
FOUR: What are those new colorways going to look like?
Never forget that Converse once gave us some of the greatest shoes of all time with the Larry Johnson aka Grandmama rocking the Aero Jams. Even Al Jefferson alluded to it in the video linked above, “Them shoes gon’ be cold too.” Yes they are, Big Al. I’m thinking maybe the Summit Lake Hornets LeBrons would be a good start.