I work for one of the biggest tech companies in the world during the day, and one of the perks of working for said company is that you get to ride on these decked-out charter buses to and from work at the expense of said tech conglomerate. These shuttle buses are equipped with leather seats and free wifi so the employees can “work” to and from the digital plantation.
So what was I doing on a late Tuesday afternoon on my way home from the 9-to-5? I was watching the TNT live stream of Game 2 of the Eastern Conference Semifinals between the Indiana Pacers and the Washington Wizards. Then this happened:
You ever have that urge to react vocally, but you can’t because you’re in a setting that would deem it inappropriate? Well, for about 1.3 seconds I totally forgot that I was on a relatively silent double-decker charter bus with around 80 people clickety-clacking on their laptops or trying to get an afternoon siesta. When Marcin Gortat put that Polish Hammer on Ian Mahinmi, this was what I did:
Like, I yelled loud quickly … then brought the tone down immediately. I looked around to see if anyone noticed, and a few folks wondered what was this weird noise that was made. Mostly, everyone else was zoned out, writing code or knee-deep in a quality nap.
This is the life of watching playoff basketball on the West Coast when games come on at 4 p.m. Here’s five other random thoughts I had while watching this clip.
ONE: Chris Webber’s “OOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHH” was almost as good as when I yell “YUUUUUUUUUUUUUULE” when folks get dunked on. C-Webb’s yell will have to suffice for the time being.
TWO: Ian Eagle called this a “Foreign Facial,” and when I heard it I died laughing. That sounds like a porn title collection or something. I bet Harlan cleans his browsing history on his laptop every week, in fear his old lady will see his appreciation of foreign facials.
THREE: If Roy Hibbert was the one who got dunked on by Gortat instead of Mahinmi, the Hibbert slanderfest would’ve reached all new levels.
FOUR: The Polish Hammer is arguably one of the top five nicknames in the NBA. Don’t ask me to name the other four.
FIVE: The other four great nicknames in the NBA in no particular order. King James, Swaggy P, Splash Brothers and Born Ready.
I wish this was and And-One, and maybe Mahinmi would’ve fell or something. Then I could’ve written an obituary. Ah well.