At first glimpse of reading this headline, you might be puzzled as to the question. Why is Magic Johnson so bad at Twitter? The man has 2.38 million followers, is surprisingly active on the medium for a man of his age and generally always has a positive take on things. There's no way he's bad at Twitter...right?
On Wednesday afternoon, Magic Johnson took his talents to Twitter after witnessing the Miami Heat and the Houston Rockets do battle in an early season battle in the NBA on Tuesday night. Magic woke up the following day and fired off this tweet.
I definitely got a chance to watch 4 early MVP candidates play in Harden, Howard, Wade and Bosh!
— Earvin Magic Johnson (@MagicJohnson) November 5, 2014
This tweet is an ambitious one to say the least. To say that only one of the four players could even have an outside shot (Harden) at winning the MVP is the only thing here that seems feasible. Maybe the other three players could've been MVP five years ago, but whatever. I'm not going to throw a ton of shade at this tweet. Like I said, it's ambitious. Let's look at the next tweet.
Kobe should also be in the early MVP talks with LeBron, Chris Paul, Blake Griffin, Anthony Davis, Carmelo, Curry, Thompson and Rose.
— Earvin Magic Johnson (@MagicJohnson) November 5, 2014
It looks like Magic just couldn't help himself here. Did he start feeling guilty? Did fans (me) start tweeting him egregiously, telling him that there's no way in Hades Dwyane Wade and his 87-year-old knees could ever win the MVP? Okay fine, maybe he caved, but…what is this tweet? Let's break out all that is wrong with this tweet.
- Kobe should also be in the early MVP talks…I'm not sure if this is just blatant homerism, Magic stole Stevie Wonder's ability to be blind (because we all know Stevie ain't blind) or this is a further explanation as to why Magic was a terrible basketball coach. I'll just assume homerism.
- ...with LeBron, CP3, Blake Griffin, Anthony Davis. Great choices here Magic, you've seen the light…
- ...Carmelo. NOOOOOOOOO.
- ....Curry. I could hear the argument for this.
- ...Thompson. Okay, now I'm confused. Are we just naming all light-skinned hoopers in the NBA? You just went Blake, AD, Curry and Klay Thompson with 4 of the last 5. Wait, is this even Klay Thompson we're speaking of? Magic only said Thompson; should we assume Tristan Thompson? I'm so confused.
- ...Rose. I mean…aight, whatever.
Magic…you make my head hurt. Unfortunately, there's more tweets.
Other early MVP candidates are Wall, LaMarcus Aldridge, Tony Parker & Dirk. When Westbrook & Durant get back they will be in the mix also.
— Earvin Magic Johnson (@MagicJohnson) November 5, 2014
So, Magic's going to just nominate EVERYBODY as a possible MVP candidate? If you notice, Magic has now nominated 19 different people who could possibly win the 2014-15 MVP. At this point, aren't players like Boogie Cousins and Al Horford offended? Somewhere, DeMar DeRozan is like, "What about me Magic?"
This is just one instance of many with Magic Johnson being bad at Twitter. You ever notice how Magic always uses exclamation points?
attention, punctuation fans - the great @MagicJohnson on a record FIFTEEN straight exclamation point tweet streak!!!
— Jimmy Kimmel (@jimmykimmel) June 30, 2014
Go to Magic's Twitter handle right now; it's rife with exclamation points. Who is this excited about everything? Magic is. Of course, who could forget this magical eloquence of basketball insight during the 2014 NBA Finals between the Spurs and the Heat?
The only way San Antonio or Miami don't win the championship is if neither team makes the finals.
— Earvin Magic Johnson (@MagicJohnson) March 7, 2014
Magic Johnson, everybody. One of the greatest human success stories this world has ever seen, but his Achilles' heel is that he's just really bad at Twitter. Everybody's gotta have a kryptonite, right?
I love the incredible insight and expert analysis you'll always find on @ESPN_FirstTake with Skip, Stephen A. & Cari. Love you guys!
— Earvin Magic Johnson (@MagicJohnson) April 30, 2014
Eh, maybe Magic's account has been hacked this whole time. No real human being would tweet this...right?

Eddie Maisonet is the founder and editor emeritus of The Sports Fan Journal. Currently, he serves as an associate editor for ESPN.com. He is an unabashed Russell Westbrook and Barry Switzer apologist, owns over 100 fitteds and snapbacks, and lives by Reggie Jackson’s famous quote, “I am the straw that stirs the drink.”