Duke Vs. North Carolina NBA Alums Each Summed Up In A Phrase

Thanks to a tweet by our editor-in-chief and a request by @brehwyatt, and with the Duke Blue Devils heading to Chapel Hill to take on the North Carolina Tar Heels tonight, it's about time for an update on the "Duke Vs. North Carolina In The NBA: Perception Vs. Reality" story.

Whereas two years ago there were 28 players in the NBA from the respective schools — 16 from Duke, 12 from UNC — that number has increased to 30 as of today: 14 Blue Devils and 16 Tar Heels.

The Dukies
Shane Battier, SF, Miami Heat
Carlos Boozer, PF, Chicago Bulls
Elton Brand, PF, Atlanta Hawks
Luol Deng, SF, Cleveland Cavaliers
Mike Dunleavy, SF, Chicago Bulls
Gerald Henderson, SG, Charlotte Bobcats
Kyrie Irving, PG, Cleveland Cavaliers
Ryan Kelly, PF, Los Angeles Lakers
Josh McRoberts, PF, Charlotte Bobcats
Mason Plumlee, PF, Brooklyn Nets
Miles Plumlee, C, Phoenix Suns
J.J. Redick, SG, Los Angeles Clippers
Austin Rivers, SG, New Orleans Pelicans
Kyle Singler, SF, Detroit Pistons

The Tar Heels
Harrison Barnes, SF, Golden State Warriors
Reggie Bullock, SG, Los Angeles Clippers
Vince Carter, SG, Dallas Mavericks
Ed Davis, PF, Memphis Grizzlies
Wayne Ellington, SG, Dallas Mavericks
Raymond Felton, PG, New York Knicks
Danny Green, SF, San Antonio Spurs
Tyler Hansbrough, PF, Toronto Raptors
Brendan Haywood, C, Charlotte Bobcats
John Henson, C/PF, Milwaukee Bucks
Antawn Jamison, PF, Los Angeles Clippers
Ty Lawson, PG, Denver Nuggets
Kendall Marshall, PG, Los Angeles Lakers
Marvin Williams, SF/PF, Utah Jazz
Brandan Wright, PF, Dallas Mavericks
Tyler Zeller, C/PF,  Cleveland Cavaliers

This time, since I'm feeling a bit under the weather and battening down the hatches for an impending nor'easter, I'm going do something a little different. Instead of the same breakdown as I did in 2012, I'm switching things up. So without further ado, here are the 30 Blue Devils and Tar Heels currently in the NBA summed up in one phrase each.

Harrison Barnes: Is he really good or really not that good?

Shane Battier: Still here defending and launching threes … just less effectively.

Carlos Boozer: Stealing paychecks like it's my job for the game I left in Utah.

Elton Brand: Once upon a time I was a double-double machine until my body broke down.

Reggie Bullock: Just call me Lob City's trade asset.

Vince Carter: Vinsanity has been grounded.

Ed Davis: Any chance I can get traded to a team without Zach Randolph and Marc Gasol so I can actually get some run?

Luol Deng: What did this defensive stalwart and all-around sound player do to deserve getting shipped to Cleveland?

Mike Dunleavy: "He's a clown."

Wayne Ellington: One time I won the NCAA Tournament MOP — not Ty or Tyler or Danny.

Raymond Felton: Just call me the miniature version of Vin Baker … or Oliver Miller.

Danny Green: Greg Paulus always knew I was good.

Tyler Hansbrough: I miss college.

Brendan Haywood: Irrelevant.

Gerald Henderson: No longer the best player on the Bobcats.

John Henson: 12 points, 8 rebounds and 2.2 blocks a night isn't bad for a string bean.

Kyrie Irving: Are we sure this superstar isn't actually an old man?

Antawn Jamison: Hanging on until those AARP benefits kick in.

Ryan Kelly: I'm pretty sure Kobe hates me.

Ty Lawson: Kyrie Irving on turbo mode.

Kendall Marshall: Suddenly, Jason Kidd 2.0 — minus the defense, rebounding, DUIs and spousal abuse parts.

Josh McRoberts: The left-handed Shavlik Randolph?

Mason Plumlee: One time I dunked three balls at once.

Miles Plumlee: Mason's older, shittier brother.

J.J. Redick: Legitimately good shooter.

Austin Rivers: A far, far cry from my father.

Kyle Singler: Mike Dunleavy 2.0.

Marvin Williams: Still not Chris Paul … or Deron Williams … or, oh, forget it.

Brandan Wright: The left-handed version of John Henson, with slightly less production but vastly superior foul-shooting skills.

Tyler Zeller: Insert brother joke.

There you have it, all 30 of the Tar Heels and Blue Devils. Tip-off to tonight's rivalry is at 9 p.m. EST. Hopefully the good Heels will show up to make it a good game versus the eighth-ranked Blue Devils.

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